HEALING OF THE MIND, BODY, AND SOUL RESULTS FROM BECOMING A PERSON, VIA RELATIONSHIP.
It's a good idea to find out a counselor's philosophy. It is going to have a big impact on you, perhaps more than anything else about them. My philosophy is that people + relationship = the good life. So being a person is about having relationship and having relationship is about being a person.
WE BECOME WHAT WE'RE HEADING TOWARDS.
Telos is a Greek word about the good life which means: we become what we're heading towards. The student becomes a graduate. The job applicant becomes an employee and then a boss. The hurt person becomes fearful and bitter and lonely, and then lonelier. The person who loves becomes a lover. We are always becoming more of the person we are on track to be.
Stop for a minute and ask yourself: who am I? That's my first question for you. Now here's the second: what kind of a person are you in the process of becoming? The core of my work is referenced in these two questions. The way I see it, everything else falls in line behind your identity.
WHO YOU ARE AND WHO YOU ARE BECOMING IS THE CORE OF MY WORK.
The best way to do the work of becoming more of a person is in relationship. Relationship opens up the door for you to heal and grow. Each one of us has a past which has marked us, a present that embodies us and a future which will find us. The healing of these three comes from being loved in relationship. A good phrase that gets at this is ‘being loved into loving.’ That's part of my job description. I can assure you I will end up caring about you whether you like it or not.
RELATIONSHIP OPENS THE DOOR FOR YOU TO HEAL AND GROW.
Healing from your past, knowing the freedom of forgiveness, gaining the courage necessary to leave behind a dark place, and becoming able to give and receive love are the personal stepping stones in relationship which will transform you into a better and better person. In good relationship you don't kind of change, you do change. Guaranteed, because good relationship breathes new identity into us, every time. That's what relationship is - the nature of life in us. My work is successful when you become more of the person you are supposed to be: a (real and true) person in (life-giving) relationship.