written by Brian Sausser

Are we freer independent, or in-dependence?

"In vain did his mind hark back, time after time, to the Book of Genesis, asking 'What would have happened?' But to this the Darkness gave him no answer. Patiently and inexorably it brought him back to the here and the now, and to the growing certainty of what was here and now demanded. Almost he felt that the words 'would have happened' were meaningless - mere invitations to wander in what the Lady would have called an 'alongside world' which had no reality. Only the actual was real: and every actual situation was new.Here in Perelandra the temptation would be stopped by Ransom, or it would not be stopped at all. The Voice - for it was almost with a Voice that he was now contending - seemed to create around this alternative an infinite vacancy. This chapter, this page, this very sentence, in the cosmic story was utterly and eternally itself; no other passage that had occurred or ever would occur could be substituted for it."

…

D​ecisions, decisions, decisions.

It seems as though we're unable to get through a single moment of the day without being bombarded with a sea of options and choices to be made. I'm (somewhat) ashamed to say that I often play a part in the paralysis caused by an option-saturated marketplace. As a barista at the local cafe, it's part of my job to help you figure out what you want when you stop by for your morning coffee. But every day, I witness the amusing and sinister reality of choice overload. What will it be today? Cappuccino, cortado, or latte? Hot or iced? Vanilla, salted caramel, lavender? What size would you like? Is whole milk all right, or do you want try an alternative? Oat or almond? And the list of questions goes on and on…

If you're anything like me, something as simple as stopping for a cup of coffee on the morning commute has become a strenuous activity wherein you leave feeling like your limited stores of attention and mental energy are depleted. And all this before the day has even gotten underway!

Paralyzed by the torrent of choices that lay before us, we're haunted by the question that haunts Dr. Ransom in the Eden-like forest of Perelandra. "What would have happened..." as Lewis writes, exiles us to an Alongside World that has no reality. Day in and day out we are faced with the fact that our world is full of choices, and the story that we are fed is that more choices means more freedom - freedom to chart our own path, to create our own world. Freedom is the ideal. When we have blessed freedom, we are fulfilled. I think freedom in its own right is good. But what if the "freedom" that we are being offered isn't actually what we've always supposed it to be? If we stop and consider the effects of this "freedom," we're confronted with the paralysis and realization that our working definition isn’t absolute (I hope), and might not be healthiest thing for us as human beings.

W​hen we think freedom, we usually think, "freedom from." Freedom from regulations imposed on us by some outside force; freedom from restrictions on our bodies or our rights; ultimately, freedom from depending on others at all. I want to invite you to take part in a little thought experiment: What if this idea of freedom - freedom from - wasn't the only way to understand freedom? What if we took a moment to change that working definition?

Instead of freedom from dependence upon others, let's define it as the freedom to depend on others.

D​epending on others doesn't sound much like freedom, does it? When we're brought up to view freedom and self-sufficiency as interchangeable terms, depending on another is slavery, not freedom. How could I consider myself free if I need you for something that I ought to be able to do on my own?

B​acking this question, I want to argue, is a deep-rooted and strongly conditioned outlook on the world that is based in fear. Resources are limited, people are unreliable, and danger lies around every corner. The reality is, each of these statements is true to an extent. An unhealthy expression of a capitalist economic model has led us to a very real scarcity of resources; the reality of this scarcity has conditioned people to watch their own backs and act out of self-interest, and this has contributed to the danger that lurks in the shadows both within and without us. But to assume that this is the way things have to be - scarce, unreliable, dangerous - isn’t our only option.

As we’re surrounded by a swarm of choices, many of which are meaningless and only contribute to the stress and anxiety of life, why don't we put a bit of mental energy toward making a choice that does make a difference, that actually leads us out of the grasp of stress and anxiety? What if we tried to shift our perspective, to view the world around us as one of abundance, reliability, and safety? In this kind of world, dependence looks a lot less like slavery than we’d supposed it to be.

It looks like learning that different points of view can actually lead to more creativity. It looks like discovering that conflict or disagreement doesn’t mean the end of relationships, and it might even cause them to become stronger. It also looks like the freedom to actually connect and talk with someone on a level that shines some light on why we’re here and what we’re doing. Sure, might show us just how limited we are, but in doing so, it shows us that we are deeply connected. It shows us that we are not alone.

In other words, dependence makes hope in the here and now possible, actually tangible.

When there is enough to go around, when people are reliable, when we can imagine actual safety, then Sartre's famous words that "hell is other people" ends up being the opposite of what our experience says. Dependence on other people might prove itself as a way into the good life (one might even call it heaven). When we don't always have to compete and strive to survive, the fact that she can do what I can't just might take on a new sort of beauty.

A​s I've undertaken this thought experiment, it's become easier to imagine that a person who isn't always afraid of not having enough also wouldn't feel the need to gain more and more at the expense of the people and the environment around her. I also want to be careful not to discount the reality of scarcity, insecurity, and danger faced by all too many people, though I think this message could be very important for a different group of people (a group that I'm a part of).

What of those people for whom these things may just be another story, one that could change for the better of both themselves and others? By simply taking a few minutes to imagine the world differently, I learned that I'm among the people who have a special freedom: the freedom to choose to view the world as one that is inviting and abundant. Learning to use this freedom has helped me to alleviate my own choice overload paralysis and the anxiety that comes with a need for self-sufficiency borne out of fear. It's as if making a good choice like this has cleared out many of the bad ones that vie for my attention.

In the unknown world of Perelandra, Dr. Ransom is faced with the realization that "only the actual [is] real: and every actual situation [is] new." Freedom, choices, decisions - they are unavoidable. Each bridge we come to in life presents us with yet another choice. We either stand still for fear of the waters below, or we cross over. The crossing of these bridges, the actual choosing, is the real. "This chapter, this page, this very sentence, in the cosmic story [is] utterly and eternally itself; no other passage that [has] occurred or ever [will] occur [can] be substituted for it."

W​hat if, in the face of our "freedom," and the choices that often paralyze us, we took the opportunity to make a choice that actually made a difference and started to change our fundamental view of the world and ourselves in it? When we make this choice, I think we'll start to see that depending on other people isn’t slavery; it's freedom. Using the freedom that the world offers us to make choices, we can actually choose a path that leads to a new kind of freedom. We'll start to move away from the paralyzing autonomy and competition that is upheld as the ultimate good, and we'll enter into the real cosmic story that Lewis writes about, the story that speaks of unity with others; the story that tells a (not so) new truth of abundance, reliability, and safety.

We are free to choose: we can live with open eyes and open hearts, letting the beauty of others transform us; or, we can remain stuck in independence, always on the defensive.

S​o, as the barista that you might run into on your morning commute, I ask you this:

W​hat will it be today? Will you live independent, or in-dependence?

P​erelandra. Lewis, C.S.

"​No Exit." Sartre, Jean Paul